Having mentored an intern who was especially "considerate," he would never refuse to help with anything.



After two months, I realized he had become the office's "errand boy": fetching packages, ordering milk tea, printing documents, and he had no time to focus on his own work. I had a talk with him. I said: Why don't you refuse those tasks that aren't yours? He replied: I'm afraid refusing would strain relationships, so I try to step back a bit, hoping others will see my good intentions.

I told him: You're mistaken. In the workplace, the more you yield, the more others will think your time isn't valuable. He asked: If I don't yield, what if they say I'm difficult to get along with behind my back? I said: If they speak ill of you just because you set boundaries, it shows they were planning to take advantage of you from the start.

I explained: there's a flaw in human nature called "fear of the weak and respect for the strong." If your generosity has no edge, it's weakness; if your concessions have no bottom line, it's tacit approval.

Later, he learned to refuse. Strangely, those who used to boss him around started to treat him more politely.

This world is very realistic: when you have the confidence to turn hostile at any moment, others will respect your dignity.
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